Cracking.

I feel myself falling back into the pit. I’m closing out my friends, I have no desire to talk to anyone or doing anything I just want to lay in bed all day and sleep. While it’s a wish I know I can’t because the are people who depend on my full do the things I need to do. I just wish there was a time for me to do what I want and have no expectations from anyone else.

Existing.

Today is one of those days when my brain is feeling me to stop existing. I’m growing tired of fighting this demon, it seems to get stronger everytime. I UAE to be able to block it out, tell it to leave me alone, tell it to shut up but those coping skills aren’t working for me. I keep busy, play the music loud, try to sing along but it just isn’t working out the thoughts anymore and it makes my heart heavy. Oh well on with my day.